Hey Now…

This post was supposed to have come up a few days before Christmas, but i believe someone interrupted me online while i was in the middle of doing this. As such, im doing it now even though Christmas is over. Not that this post has much to do with it any way.

Everyone seems to be rather cheery this Christmas season and for good reason because its the happiest and most festive time of the year. But ironically, for the past 2 Christmases, i’ve had to spend it away from the one i love the most. Its just….circumstances and no one can be blamed for it. But i do wish that all this might end soon, and that i will see my girl once again. Who knows, in a few Christmases, i might just get to spend it with her.

I think as the year ends, i think we begin thinking more of about the year that has flashed by us in such a proggressive fashion and once its New year’s, we forget all of that and we start thinking about what we’d like to do in the coming year. Any how, 2008 has been pretty amazing for me. For me and alot of my peers, 2008 has meant a new school, new friends, new perspectives, and maybe a new life. I’ve been happy in school and for the first time in my life, the american idol that i supported actually won the competition of the same name. Haha. I think the whole point of life is to experience all that you can and yet stay rooted enough to a group of friends that ensures your life doesnt fly off like a loose kite. Freedom is good, but i think we all need an anchor in our lives to keep everything in check. Things like Sunday lunches with the family, or Monday movie marathons, or whatever you and your family do. All these things serve as a mirror to who you really are, and it reminds you who you are every week after an entire week of being someone you may not be in school, at work, or in society. In the end, your family and friends are really the mirror on your wall, showing you who you have really become.

One thing i admit to not having done enough this year is making friends. I simply don’t see the need to make so many new friends sometimes. I know that in my course of study, acquaintances are the best things to have, but i’m not the sort of person that enjoys being in the student union, getting to know everyone, waving to every alternating person you walk past on the way to one class because you know too many people and you cant ignore their prescence. Its funny because i wonder how these people deal with themselves on a rough day. Those days that you just wish to have some quiet time to think and you dont wish to smile, and you have to walk past all these people you know, all these people whom you were close enough to share a friendly salutation yet not close enough for you to share your thoughts with. I think it must feel absolutely self-explosive. In the end, its still the old friends you fall back on. The people whom you know so well that you hate what they do sometimes, and yet you’d be willing to die for any day.

Right now, i’m feeling ill and pretty much sad because my baby isnt with me, and i think year ends are just sad. Maybe its because when you have a good year, you tend to remember the events of that year and you feel an unwillingness to let it fade away into the past as a new year approaches. Whereas when you have a bad year, you’d be dying to leave it behind and move on. But of course, some people just seem to have good years all the time, while some people’s lives are just so turbulent and they never seem to have good years. Well, in any case, this is the sad time of the year for me, where Underoath and Saosin give way to Augustana and Damien Rice. I will leave this post with couple of thanks.

1. Shearen – Thank you for being the love of my life and for everything I am, I owe to you. I love you.
2. Jo – Despite being halfway around the world, thank you for making me smile every time i think of you.
3. Nini – Thanks for being such a lovely girl. I hope one of my daughters may have a heart like yours.
4. Nicholas – Good luck at perfecting your already good life and thanks for being a friend.
5. Amirul –  Coolest dude i know. Take care of Lorry. Thanks for the good times.
6. Sophia – Thanks for making classes that little bit less dreadful. You’ve been wonderful to me.
7. Jeeva – Priorities my friend, you have great character, POL-ITE gogo!
8. Sherrie – Thanks for just popping up in my life. Be the princess you say you’ll be. Haha.
9. Jerry –  You’re a life saver and the ass i love to be in school with. Thanks.
10. Shanti – For the time we spend together, its amazing we’re still that close. Thanks for being everything you are.
11. Nikki – You’re brilliant and you have great things going for you.  Me and Shan will always be here.

So What Did You Think Would Happen???

“So what did you think would happen”? That is one big question I sometimes feel compelled to spill out upon some completely thoughtless act. You know how it is so often that you plan something with a friend a week in advance, and everything is all set. Then the night before the meeting, you send an innocent confirmation message disguised as an enquiry of what time to meet, and all of sudden, your friend tells you that he/she either has something last minute the next day, or that they completely forgot that they already had plans on that day.

 

So my question stems from the angle that, presuming i didnt send that confirmation message, what would that person have done? How long would that person wait before saying anything? Would the person even say anything if i hadn’t asked? And all of a sudden, I find myself fighting to swallow those words, and i just want to ask them. “So what did you think would happen”?

 

This is a singular issue brought up by me to bring out the point of teenage thoughtlessness. In my opinion, the teenage faculty has become an instituition of deviance and nobody seems to be bothered with anything else but themselves. Put it bluntly, teenagers do what they like, when they like it, without thinking about the people that are somehow interconnected by their abscence of discretion.

 

When was the last time you called home to tell your parents you were coming home late? 

When was the last time you called home to inform your parents that you won’t be having dinner at home?  

When was the last time you were on time?

When was the last time you had dinner at home?

When was the last time you refocussed your life upon what truly matters to you?

When was the last time you forgot your personal criteria and spent lots of time out chasing butterflies?

When was the last time you cried while singing the national anthem?

When was the last time you felt national pride?

When was the last time….you cared?

 

I think the list is unextinguishable and this is just a mere fragment of what im trying to put forth here. Everywhere you go, you see teenagers, good or bad ones, having the same problem. And that is, they just live their lives in such featherly fashion, taking everything lightly, floating where the wind blows them to, never deciding where they themselves wish to be anchored. As the locals say, these teenagers are just so      “Bo Chap”, and this brings me back to the classic case presented to you at the beginning of this post. People can actually be disinterested to the extent of not even bothering to inform parties involved about change of plans until asked. Its like, if i don’t ask, you won’t say.

 

to be continued….

Oh come on!!!!

Within the duration of the past week I have been hearing the proud rantings of Liverpool fans about how they beat Chelsea and all. I am in no aspect a Chelsea fan and I do not care if Chelsea loses the season, but these proud Liverpool fans are driving me a little up the wall. Here is why.

 

I remember early in the season when Liverpool beat Manchester United 2-1 in their premier league encounter and all the Liverpool fans were gleefully waving the victory at everybody’s faces. They lost to newly promoted Stoke City the next week. Need i say more?

This time around, Liverpool beat Chelsea 1-0 with a rather pathetic goal i might add. Once again, they thrust this victory upon everyone who would listen thinking the world of themselves. One week later, they have to rely on a penalty kick to beat Portsmouth 1-0. While they were struggling there, Chelsea (the team that they so proudly beat the previous week), were hammering Hull City 3-0.

 

In Friday’s straits times paper, they headlined Liverpool’s victory as “Reds KEEP IT GOING”. While this definitely validates their victory, i think it also clearly emphasises their propensity to do poorly after a good showing. I mean, in all honesty, is there anything spectacular about Manchester United or Chelsea beating teams 2 games in a row. Answer is no, because it is what is expected of a top club. So clearly, this headline includes the element of a miracle that Liverpool “kept it going”, also suggesting that they are not a top team.

 

I think the point i am trying to make here is simple. I think Liverpool fans should shut up a little bit about winning games, especially since the team they idolise has proven on 2 occasions this early into the season that they have the tendency to do well, and then fuck up, or almost fuck up the next game. No offence to Liverpool fans out there really, I love Torres and his pretty hair too, but seriously sometimes you guys talk to much, too soon. Thats all im saying regarding this matter. I cant even begin expressing my abhorrence for Chelsea, but even then i think they are respectable, and their fans are respectable. Feel free to comment if you agree or disagree.

 

As a footnote, of course I’m a Man Utd fan.

4 Parts to an Argument……

A segment of my thoughts dedicated itself toward wondering how certain people find themselves in constructive and productive relationships, while others lead love lives that constitute no amount of personal enrichment and learning. The non-extinguishable list of factors reads on and on, but i believe that a very big portion of this even larger spectrum of factors is perhaps, well…..4 parts to a argument.

 

See, to approach this in fairly systematic fashion, first we have to understand what the 4 parts of an argument are. For the purposes of easy comprehension, let me just put all this in needlessly technical terms.

First, there is the stage of aggression, where the main aggressor raises the topic of the argument and expresses discontent. Next is the stage of acknowledgement, where the other party acknowledges the pressence of such a problem. Following this is the stage of consolation where the presumed wrong-doer coaxes the aggressor out of anger. And finally, the stage of summary, where the initial aggressor has to take charge and lead the argument out of danger in an objective manner. So, therefore…..

1. Stage of Aggression
2. Stage of Acknowledgement
3. Stage of Consolation
4. Stage of Summary

 

Now that we have a clear idea of this, let me just introduce the roles of the two partners in the various stages. Basically, for my concept to work in the real world, one party has to assume responsibility for 2 pre-set stages. Meaning, not any 2 stages, but instead, the aggressor(stage 1) has to be the same person summarising the argument and leading it out of harm’s way(stage 4). So this is how it goes……

1. 1st Partner – Stage 1 and Stage 4
2. 2nd Partner – Stage 2 and Stage 3

 

Now, these roles are NOT gender specific. The question of who takes responsibility over which stages of the argument largely depends on who is the one having an issue with the other. The concept is thus quite simple. To put it in simple terms, if you pick the fight, you direct it and resolve it in a clear objective manner with the intention of relationship betterment. And if someone has picked an issue with you, while also assuming you are clearly wrong, all you need to do, is listen, understand, and do damage control. So i suppose the roles are pretty fairly assigned when it comes to workload.

 

Well, of course there are alot of presumptions prior to the application to the concept. For example, this will only work if there is a clear sense of perspective about who is right and wrong. This concept cannot be applied to a topic of negotiable standing or a topic that has to be thrashed out. This concept is applicable only when one party has done something obviously wrong. While once again, the line of right and wrong is questionable and grey, but you get my drift nonetheless i hope. However, although the concept cannot be used as the theory of a successful relationship, it can definitely stand firm as the explanation behind a cursed and troubled one. Meaning, if you violate the 4 parts to an argument in a situation where this concept is applicable, then I assure you that it will not end well. Read on for various scenarios.

 

 For convenience purposes, allow me to just introduce a stereotype here. Now, presuming a guy is upset with his girlfriend for being late, which is a very common problem here in Singapore. He raises the topic to her, telling her off for being late. This would include things like why he is angry, what does her being late make him feel, how being late is bad (Stage 1 completed). Girl then acknowledges that she is in wrong (Stage 2 completed). Girl apologises and does damage control ie. hugging, kissing, expressions of love (Stage 3 completed). Guy, seeing how positive his girlfriend is in dealing with the problem and holding no contest to the obvious fact that he is correct, directs the argument out of danger and towards reconcilliation (Stage 4 completed). And we are done. This is a perfect scenario where a couple carries out their roles in the 4 part argument in an objective way, where the guy serves the duty of a man, taking charge of a relationship, and the girl, understand fully and learning why it is bad to be late. Excuse the corny-ness, but it is all very true. Believe me.

Now what goes wrong is when the aggressor, wishes not to direct the argument. Meaning, he wants to throw his temper but he isn’t man enough to lead his relationship out of trouble. So what happens is, he gets stuck at stage 1, where he bombards the girl with his sorrow and his discontent, as well as nagging about how horrible she is for being late. Then it gets emotional and he keeps quiet. At this point in time, he is more upset about the argument, than the actual issue itself, meaning, emotional overkill. Also, the girl feels like crap because she has been subjected to emotional overkill. So we move on with the girl doing her job ie. stages 2 and 3. But wait, after she is done, the guy is still too emotional to complete and summarise the argument. So he remains silent. The girl is clueless about what he wants, and he is too absorbed in self induced sorrow or anger, and then…………they both get impatient, because he feels the girl isnt doing enough to make him feel better, while the girl doesnt know what he wants. SO they fight and Kaboom….there we go. FAIL.

 

Using the same scenario, another problem of less serious, but equally chronic outcomes can occur. This problem arises when the same kind of guy, one that wants to get angry but doesnt want to solve the problem, raises his issue with his girlfriend. However instead of doing the important stages of understanding and learning, the girlfriend takes the easy way out by immediately trying to coax the guy out of anger. FAIL…because, the girl has not learnt anything, the guy thinks he is king because his girlfriend just coaxes him out of anger for reasons she herself does not comprehend, and because this problem will come back to haunt them again.

 

Lastly, comes the most obvious reason for failure. When the guy introduces the problem, and girl refuses to acknowledge it. Arguing along very thin and unsubstantial lines for the sake of pride. (Note: this is presuming she is very clearly wrong, which is a prerequisite for the application of this concept anyway). Guy then gets very very angry, and girl gets very very angry, because of pride of course. And Kaboom Kaboom…..very ugly ending. Even if it ends nicely, it is likely to end with the above situation i have mentioned. Unproductive and ready to haunt again.

 

So, quite simply, one party has to bring up the problem, be clear about what they want to come out of the argument, and lead both of them out of it. While the other, serves as the crucial balance where by carrying out acknowledgement consolation correctly, can actually create a very level-headed and conducive environment for both parties to go through an enriching and productive argument. Like i said, this concept isn’t a theory for success, but i believe it is a pretty good explanation for failure.

 

Remember, 4 parts to an argument. Any questions, post as comments. Till soon.

So…….uh huh..

I had initial plans to ignore this page for at least another day. But somehow being very awake at 3 in the morning makes me very guilty about not posting. So…..haha.

 

School generally TP resumes term time in a week and I cannot quite decide if I would very much like to be back at school stimulating my brains with things i don’t particularly enjoy, or if I would rather wake up at 10 everyday to have macdonalds breakfast and lounge around doing nothing at all, before going out for tennis once again at night.

Note: I have been playing alot of tennis in the recent holiday month.

 

My vacation has seen the light at two ends of a tunnel. At the moment, I do nothing every day, and play tennis or go out every night. But prior to this episode that is very unbecoming of a person like myself, I was pretty much planning every day in such a way that every min of the duration from the time i awake, to the time i sleep, would be constructively used to do something, anything. This includes a 8 day working stint at Levi’s suntec. No, i did not quit after 8 days. The contract duration was just as such. haha so actually I have done everything a person is supposed to do on his poly vacation. Except that I have been to NO chalets, No bbqs, No stayovers, No clubs, NO gigs, and NO other country.

 

In other news, a very big belated congragulations to the dear Price for winning the new paper new face 2008. It has been a very great joy to be a part of your life. As I had once expressed to her, it feels weird that after weeks of hanging out with her at coffeeshops in Siglap and talking about things of no particular importance, she goes and wins this thing that escalates her to new celebrity status. It’s like knowing a person in their most normal and usual environment, and then see them take on the world with their stuff that same instant. Its powerfully enriching to feel something like that, because all of a sudden i see that you don’t have to be famous, and abnormal. You can still be the girl next door, and do great things. So that’s good going for you, Price. Once again, very honoured and proud to have been aqcuainted to you.

 

And in quick summary, Abby has just got back from 16 days in Europe, Abby has got a new dog, everyone is crazy about tennis, and Shearen is back in Indo for the week to attend her cousins wedding. And, im looking forward to the bbq/celebration that Nicole(Ni Ni) has very kindly volunteered to plan for. haha.

 

Till soon.

WTFness…

I don’t even have a reason why I’ve been absent from this page for this long. I guess it all stemmed from the start of exams, where I stopped posting and never got about to doing it again up till now. So much has happened during my abscence and i should really post new pictures to tell this long tale of mine. But that can wait till another day. For now, this post is just to mark my return to my own domain.

School starts on the 20th of October, and hopefully i don’t hit another dry spell before then. Which also means i “pledge” to post religously from tommorrow onwards. Because i have just been lazy cause so many things have been going on. So much so that i gave up documenting all of them here anyway.

 

Till soon.

Mug Mug mug…what?

It’s an insane time to be studying, and it’s positively insa-ner to not be zoned out or bored yet. I think i may have just started liking a subject i will never again study for the rest of my life, because the final exam for the subject occurs in about 5 hours and will end in 7. So, queer.

Best part is that I’m not in this mayhem alone. Crystal’s found herself a part in it too haha. No one seems to understand anything from our trusty textbooks and yet we trudge on in vain through the night, in search for answers we will need but don’t have, and in a quest for sleep that we won’t get. At least everything is going to be over soon and it’s a two month long break. Too bad the JC kids only get out end september.

 

Me: Eh, so do we need to draw out the entire Chi-square table of values?

Crystal: No.

Me: Oh, ah fuck, I’ve been wasting time.

 

 

Till later.

Going Under in a Daydream….

I fall flat in the aftermath of today’s paper and fall short of the promise of a burden-free holiday. Quite honestly, I have never had the end of the exams marred by such unfortunate and tragic circumstances. In previous events, I either finish my exams well and feel no burden, or I finish them badly but without much circumstance. This time, the imminent arrival of the supplementary paper puts such a massive weight on my shoulders. I feel like I’m sinking into the ground.  

 

Then again, Jerry has just updated me the conditions and circumstance by which we have to sit for the supp papers, and, I guess i might just clear it. In any case, tommorrow marks the end of the exams and i feel pretty good, relieved if not anything.

Come friday, it’s Teacher’s Day for the wonderful people that get us through school. So, a premature Happy Teacher’s Day to a few very special educators such as Dr Jason Tan, Mr Tan Kee Hoe, Mrs Lim the dear DM that got me to grow up, and lastly to Miss Low Kia Sze the ever beautiful.

 

I dont know where to work, I dont know where to work, please tell me where to work.

Love is in the Air….

Michael Phelps with Stephanie Rice.

 

Plastered in today’s Straits Times and across probably every tabloid across the world are the very lovely pictures of Michael Phelps “getting close” to Stephanie Rice. They were seen getting really close at an post olympic party organised by former world swimmer Ian Thorpe. Rumour has it that they could very well be romantically linked. But hey, don’t they look absolutely lovely together? I think the picture is a very very wonderful representation of new love. In any case, for the benefit of those who don’t know who Michael Phelps or Stephanie Rice is, Phelps just won 8 olympic golds and Rice just won 3. Pretty nice isn’t it? Swimmer with swimmer, winner with winner, good-looking with good-looking. Haha. Well, i sincerely hope the rumours of their romance are true, or will become true. Really wish them all the best. Take that Eamon Sullivan (Rice’s ex) and Amanda Beard ( Phelp’s rumoured ex, who said “Ewwww” when asked if she was dating him). Amanda Beard is so poorly mannered.

 

Beard, 26, denied that she was dating Phelps, 23, saying, “Eww, that’s nasty. I have never, ever hooked up with Michael Phelps,” Beard told a radio station in Phoenix yesterday.

“Come on, I have really good taste,” she said. “He’s really not my type.” Asked how the rumors have spread, Beard said she had no clue. “We don’t even talk to each other,” she said.

 

Love is in the air.

The End of a Fairytale….

Today marks the end of the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games. I’m pretty sure I won’t be the only one upset that the games are over. I’m also quite positive that tomorrow, when normal television programmes resume their usual broadcasts, many will suffer from an inevitable withdrawal syndrome induced by one of the most memorable Olympic Games to date.

16 days of pure magic with 10,000 athletes giving everything they’ve got, with all the tears, courage, strength, and grace they can muster put forth in such examplary magnitudes. To every athlete at the Beijing 2008 Olympics, I hold the upmost respect and admiration. I can only imagine the pride and joy these athletes feel when they win a medal at the Olympic games, or set a world record, or for that matter, finish a marathon. The thought often brings me close to tears.

 

Well, here is a shoutout to some of the athletes that have caught mine, and probably the world’s attention in this Olympics. I won’t mention their individual accolades as it would just be too long.

1. Michael Phelps – Swimming
2. Yelena Isinbayeva – Pole Vault
3. Matthew Mitcham – Diving
4. Usain Bolt – Athletics
5. Shelly-Ann Fraser – Athletics
6. Anna Bessonova – Rythmic Gymnastics
7. Cheng Fei – Gymnastics
8. Zhang Ning – Badminton
9. Liesel Jones – Swimming
10. Rebecca Soni – Swimming
11. Evgenia Kanaeva – Rythmic Gymnastics
12. Li Jiawei – Table Tennis
13. Emma Snowsill – Triathlon
14. Federica Pellegrini – Swimming
15. Chris Hoy –  Cycling
16. Zou kai – Artistic Gymnastics
17. Feng Tianwei – Table Tennis
18. Matthias Steiner – Weightlifting
19. Kosuke Kitajima – Swimming
20. Oussama Mellouli – Swimming
21. Rebecca Adlington – Swimming
22. LeShawn Merrit – Athletics
23. Samuel Kamau Wanjiru – Marathon
24. Andreas Thorkildsen – Javelin
25. Tia Hallebaut – High Jump
26. Liu Zige – Swimming
27. Nelson Evora – Triple Jump
28. Guo Jing Jing – Diving
29. Zhang Yining – Table Tennis
30. Yang Wei – Artistic Gymnastics
31. Shawn Johnson – Artistic Gymnastics
32. Aaron Peirsol – Swimming
33. Ryan Lochte – Swimming
34. Stephanie Rice – Swimming
35. Valerie Vili – Shot Put
36. Jeremy Wariner – Athletics
37. Fabian Cancellara – Cycling
38. Alyson Felix – Athletics
39. Kristin Armstrong – Cycling
40. Park Kyung-mo – Archery

 

This weekend has been very detrimental to my study campaign. It’s been raining so hard that everything feels really sleepy and slow. I can’t find the strength to pick up my books and study. I just want to fade away and flop into bed like a gelatinous limp squid. Lol. Oh well, hopefully tomorrow morning brings me better luck, can’t wait for all this to be over, it’s going to be such a season of fun.